Posts tagged as:

Women

I’ll be watching the Superbowl Sunday night, and as a former resident of the Hoosier State, cheering on the Colts.

Also because Payton Manning is their Quarterback, and he likes Oreos. I like Oreos too. So Payton and I have A LOT in common.

I really do enjoy a good football game now and then.

Especially if the Bears are winning. Or if Notre Dame is winning. Or if USC is losing.

I don’t really understand all the rules. I get the basic premise. Move the ball down the field, try not to get knocked down by some big, scary dude. Run across the goal line. NEVER let go of the ball. NO MATTER WHAT! (I heard that in a movie.)

I’ve even mastered how the whole Down thing works. I’m kinda proud of that.

But that’s about where my knowledge stops.

Oh, and I know the team dumps Gatorade on their coach at the end of the game when they win.

That’s your reward for success?

Men are so strange.

But I also know that a lot of you ladies could care less about the Superbowl. And some of you are excited about Sunday night only because it means an end to a very long season. No longer will you be a football widow on Monday, Thursday and Sunday. At least until next year.

So for those of you who just aren’t into throwing around the Ol’ Pig Skin, here’s some suggestions for ways you can enjoy the biggest football night of the year too.

1. Everybody knows the commercials and the half time show are really the best part. Just watch those and bring along a good book or your laptop for entertainment while the ball is in play.

2. Occupy yourself by redesigning both teams uniforms in your mind to make them more fashionable.

3. EAT! Good food goes hand in hand with the Superbowl. Dump the diet for one day, and eat junk food to your heart’s content.

4. Invite your girlfriends and their hubbies over to watch the game. The girls can dish in the kitchen while the guys high five in front of the TV.

5. Make a fair trade with your hubby. You watch the Superbowl with him, he takes  you to the newest Nicholas Sparks movie.

6. Console yourself with this thought- There are approximately 174 days, give or take a few, until the 2010-11 football season kicks off.

Have a great Superbowl Sunday!

{ 4 comments }

I don’t really ever enjoy a trip to the doctor, especially the OBGYN. But I had to go last week.

I was especially dreading the part where they weigh you. Which is totally unfair because you have all your clothes on — mine doesn’t even ask you take off your shoes — and you just ate pancakes for breakfast. Every woman knows those three factors can add up as much as 10 extra pounds.

Have you noticed that the doctor’s scale almost always says you’re a lot fatter than you’re bathroom scale says you are anyway? Of course you’re cheap Walmart scale is more accurate. So I’d say you can subtract at least 15 pounds from what the doctor tells you.

Take off 10 more, and that’s what you put on your driver’s license.

Making the weigh-in even more painful that morning, the svelte nurse asked me about how much I usually weigh.

What? You’re the one with the scale. You tell me! Don’t make me say it out loud.

I sort of mumbled a number to her – What? You didn’t think I was gonna put that in print on the Internet did you?

She fiddled around for a few seconds with those nasty little inaccurate weights while I, too afraid to look, stared at a diagram of You’re Reproductive System and tried to calculate how many pounds I could subtract for my flip-flops.

The whole shoe excuse thing works better in the winter when you’re wearing snow boots.

Interrupting my mathematical wizardry the nurse announced, “You lost a few pounds then. ”

Holding my breath, I slowly turned and looked at the scale. It said I weighed four pounds, four whole pounds,  less than my scale at home.

With clothes, pancakes, flip-flops and all!

I wanted to hug her and say, “Bless your heat! I love you!” But I tried to act cool and just said, “Oh. You know. I’ve been trying .”

She looked at little disappointed at my reaction. I think she was expecting the hug.

Inside I was dancing a little jig. According to their chart I’d lost nine pounds in the last six weeks, while my scale at home barely budged. That thing is going in the trash.

I was so happy after that I almost didn’t notice all the other horrible things they did to me. Or the gawky med student.

Really! The experience is unpleasant enough. They bring in Doogie Howser, and I worry I’ll get arrested for inappropriate conduct with a minor.

But I figured if they did put out an APB for me, at least they would have my new, slimmer weight in the description. I mean, that’s something, right?

{ 5 comments }

Hurry Up and Wait

May 9, 2009 · 4 comments

This morning was — well, exciting isn’t exactly the right word for it — um, interesting?

I woke up at 4 a.m. with some some cramping. I’d had some the day before too, and just assumed they were Braxton Hicks contractions. I laid in bed for an hour and a half and it grew worse. I got up to use the bathroom around 5:30, and noticed some spotting. So I called the after hours number for the doctor. The receptionist asked me all sorts of questions, then told me to go to Labor and Delivery at the hospital and be examined. It was Saturday, so I couldn’t go to the doctor’s office.

We arrived at the hospital around 7. They took me to an exam room on the L&D floor, and hooked me up to the monitor. The fetal monitor showed that the baby wasn’t under any stress, and I could feel that he was still really active.

Since I had a scheduled C-section with David I ‘ve never been in labor, so I didn’t really know how I should be feeling. I was afraid I’d over-reacted, and they were going to tell me to just go back home. But my contractions were strong enough to register, strong enough to be pretty uncomfortable, and only about 3 minutes apart though they didn’t last very long.

Around 8 o’ clock the nurse gave me a shot of Tributaline, a drug used to stop pre-term contractions. A few minutes after the shot I could feel my abdomen relax and the contractions slowed down and weren’t as strong.

Then we were told that we were just waiting for the doctor on call to come in and see me. But then someone really in labor came in, and doctor had to deliver a baby before she could see me.

While we were waiting for the doctor, the mid-wife who’s a part of the OBGYN practice I go to came in around 9 and examined me. She determined that my cervix was still closed, which was a good sign. She also said that the small amount of bleeding didn’t appear to be coming from inside the uterus. Also good news. She did send a test to the lab to make sure my bag of waters hadn’t ruptured.  That came back negative, but she also seemed to think that things might start progressing.

In fact the mid-wife was very enthusiastic about the possibility of me having a baby today. And excitedly told me that perhaps I wouldn’t need a C-section, and could deliver vaginally after all. I tried to smile, but her perkiness sort of made me want to slap her. If I really were in labor and she was down there cheering me on, I’m pretty sure I’d end up kicking her.

I’m not into natural birth at all. I’ll take any and every kind of medical intervention I can legally get, and I was just fine with having a C-section. I can’t imagine what she would have said if I told I wasn’t going to breastfeed either. Oh, mercy. I’m sure an encouragingly peppy lecture would have ensued.

We continued to wait, and as the first dose of Tributaline wore off the contractions intensified again. The nurse was going to give me another dose, but my heart rate was too high, a side-effect of the drug. Then she told me at 35 weeks that drug rarely works anyway, but it was worth a try.

So we waited and waited. Finally the doctor came in around 11. She did another exam and took some cultures to check for infection. She confirmed that the cervix was closed. They decided to monitor me a little longer, and finally moved me out of the exam room to a regular room. Which I was very thankful for. The exam room was small, hot, windowless had a very uncomfortable table, and I couldn’t use my cell phone in there.

In our rush to get out of the house this morning I still had the where-with-all to throw my video and digital cameras in the suitcase I’d already packed for the hospital along with my laptop just in case we had to stay. It was killing me not to be able to get online and update Facebook and Mommie Daze. There is only wireless Internet access in a special lounge in the hospital so I couldn’t use my laptop, but once in the room I was at least able to update Facebook on my phone. (Who wants to give me a Blackberry Curve? Then I could blog on my phone too.)

What a stupid thing to worry about right? But I think  it somehow made me feel like I had a little control over the situation, and certainly lessened some of the boredom of  just waiting.

After they moved me, the contractions slowed down quite a bit again, without more medicine, and they weren’t as uncomfortable. The tests for infection came back negative as well. The doctor decided there was no reason for me to stay since things didn’t seem to be progressing.

I wasn’t allowed to eat or drink anything the whole time we were at the hospital. The last thing I’d had was around 10 o’ clock the night before. So after we left we went Panera for lunch. Oh, was I starving! If you’ve been there you know they have the Pick Two, half a sandwich and half a bowl of soup. They should have a Pick Four for hungry pregnant women.

I’m just at home resting now, but I wasn’t put on bed rest. I’m still having contractions. They’re short and just a little uncomfortable, and intermittent. Sometimes they’re 8 minutes apart and sometimes 15 or more. If I sit still they seem to really diminish, so I’m trying not to move a lot. There hasn’t been any more spotting at all.

I’ve had a bad cold this week, and not a lot of sleep because of the congestion. I don’t know if that has anything to do with it. Otherwise there doesn’t seem to be a cause for what’s happening.

I really don’t know what to expect next. I don’t know how long this can go on for, but I don’t think I’ll make it to June 4th, the date of my scheduled C-section. So now we just wait and see. Although I’ve sort of had a feeling for a week or so that Wade was going to be early.

Wade’s big enough now at 35 weeks that the only real concern if he’s born before 37 weeks is his lung development.

I’m pretty calm about it, and I know it’s all in the Lord’s hands. Nature will take it’s course one way or the other.

If I don’t end up back in the hospital before, I see the Dr. again Tuesday, so maybe I’ll learn more then.

{ 4 comments }

One of Those Days

February 5, 2009 · 4 comments

Ever have one of those days when you’re in the shower and you just rinsed your hair, but you can’t remember if it was the shampoo or the conditioner that you rinsed out? Then you wonder if maybe all you did was get your hair wet, so you have to start the whole process all over?

I’m having one of those days.

{ 4 comments }

National Man Day

February 2, 2009 · 2 comments

I think congress ought to just go ahead and declare Super Bowl Sunday National Man Day.

I mean it pretty much is already anyway.

What’s more manly than a day filled with football?

Dirt, sweat, grunting, full body contact.

And that’s just making sure the surround sound is hooked up and working right.

Why do you need surround sound to watch football? It’s not like you can hear the football as it whirls past the head of the wide receiver and gets intercepted by the offense.

(I get one point each for the three football terms used above.)

When I got up at 6:30 yesterday morning there was already Super Bowl coverage on TV.

TWELVE HOURS before kick off!

It probably started at mid-night.

Every woman in America knows that Super Bowl Sunday is the one day of the year that there is not a single chance, even if pigs did fly and hell froze over, that you are going to gain control of the remote. In fact I’m pretty sure we wouldn’t even dare ask. It’s just sort of an unspoken rule that on this day we women-folk cease nagging, forget about the honey-do list, take the trash out ourselves and let the men-folk sit and watch sports all day long.

Meanwhile, we busy ourselves making man-food like nachos, and burgers and things smothered with bacon and cheese. Food that, on any other day, you’d tell him he couldn’t eat, because it’s going to kill him and he’s not going to have a heart attack and leave you all alone to raise the children and shovel the driveway!

It’s only fair.

We girls pretty much have a monopoly on the other holidays.

Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter — all the elaborate menu planning and gift buying is right up our alley. Valentine’s Day and Sweetest Day are really all about us too. Mother’s day, definitely our day.

There is Father’s Day, but it only serves a small part of the male population.

But Super Bowl Sunday — that’s all-inclusive regardless of age or parental status.

Even my four-year-old son was running around yelling about, “The biggest football game ever!”

I actually don’t mind watching the Super Bowl. I find a good game of football entertaining now and them. There’s all the pageantry with the the opening ceremony and half-time. And the commercials always provide some comic relief. But I know I just don’t enjoy it with the same intensity as my husband.

Well, maybe if the Bears made it to the Super Bowl again…

So to guys everywhere I raise my glass of Velveetta.

I hope you all had a very happy Man Day.

{ 2 comments }

I Just Don’t Like It

January 26, 2009 · 12 comments

Hi!

My name is Colleen, and I do not like being pregnant.

There I said it.

Shocked? Horrified?

Or maybe you’re a little empathetic.

Don’t go calling child services just yet.

I like being a mom. I love my son. I can’t wait to hold and cuddle this new little life that’s growing inside of me.

I just really don’t care for the nine months that precede the diaper changes and feedings.

I’ve meant those women who say, “I just loved being pregnant!” I’m sure they do. I have nothing against them. Some of them are good friends of mine.

I’m just not them.

I don’t like being nauseous for the first four months.

I don’t like going to the doctor all the time.

I don’t like having blood tests and peeing in a tiny cup.

I don’t like being tired all the time.

I don’t like taking naps every afternoon when there are a million other things I’d rather be doing.

I don’t like night after night of fitful sleep.

I don’t like getting out of bed three or four time to use the bathroom.

I don’t like seeing my waist disappear as stretch marks and extra pounds appear.

I don’t like wearing pants with an elastic waist and tops that look like drapes.

I don’t like taking vitamins the size of horse pills that make me sick if I don’t eat half the food in the house first.

I don’t like the waiting. Oh, the waiting. 40 weeks is a long, long time.

Now I will admit there are a few highlights.

The moment you first discover the good news.

Sharing the news with your husband and friends and family.

Hearing that strong heartbeat.

Seeing the baby on the ultrasound.

Finding out the gender.

Feeling the baby move and kick.

The yummy cake at the baby shower.

But it doesn’t matter how you spin it. I still don’t really enjoy being with child. To me pregnancy is just one of the those things you have to do, like paying taxes and going to the dentist. If only babies really were delivered by the stork.

You probably think I’m just whining and being selfish. But I’ve thought about this…a lot. And you know what? It’s OK not to like it.

I’m not going to pretend that I’m having a good time feeling lousy.

We’ve glamorized pregnancy with all the movie stars in their flouncy designer dresses and high heels. A baby bump is the new fashion accessory. But for me, and I think probably for some of you, that’s just not reality.

I’m grateful that I can have babies. I am grateful for a first pregnancy that was healthy and uneventful, and a second that seems to be so far.

But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

So there.

If you ask me how I am, and I’m not glowing and gushing, that’s why.  And if you’re pregnant and spending more time hugging the toilet than knitting your baby’s entire layette, go ahead and admit you’re miserable.

It’s O.K.

Really.

I doesn’t make you a bad mom.

No one will be waiting at the hospital to take your baby away.

I know it will be worth it when I hear the baby cry for the fist time, look into those innocent eyes and hold the baby close.

I just have to survive this first.

{ 12 comments }

This week Swag is featuring Stella Rocco. You’ll find pretty Tees and Tops for women with modern botanical designs at Stella Rocco’s on line store.

I came across Stella Rocco a few months ago and the simple, elegant artwork on the shirts caught my eye right away. Owner Dina says the designs she and her sister create are inspired by, “Beautiful flowers and patterns found in nature.”

Stella Rocco first launched in 2004. “I wanted to create a line of modern & comfortable tees with original
artwork.  I started with four nature-inspired designs created by myself and my sister, and a website. We named the business after my sister’s dogs,” says Dina.

Dina says hearing from happy customers is the most rewarding part about running Stella Rocco. “It is wonderful to get feedback from people who like the designs we created!”

Dina sent me the Orchids short sleeve Tee in coffee to try out it. It was just as lovely as the photos on the website. And the fabric was so soft and comfy. A Stella Rocco Tee will quickly become one of your favorite things in your closet.

Win It!

Stella Rocco is offering one lucky reader the chance to win the Orchids Cap Sleeve Top in coffee (medium brown). The neckline has a wide scoop.  The fabric is a super soft lightweight cotton with slightly metallic gold flowers and a dark brown stem. Retail value is $28.00.

To enter, visit Stella Rocco, then come back here and leave a comment ON THIS POST with your favorite item. Comments not following the rules will be disqualified.

Earn an extra entry by posting about this contest on your blog, and linking to this post and to Stella Rocco. If you do the extra credit, let me know by leaving a separate comment with the link to your post.

Bloggers and non-bloggers may enter. The contest is open internationally.

The contest will run until 11:59 p.m. EST Dec. 10th.

I’ll randomly draw a winner, and announce the winner on the next addition of Swag.

The winner will also be contacted by email, and will have three days to reply. If the winner does not reply in three days, another will be chosen. You may also check Prizey Fetch to see if you’ve won.

Have a women-owned business you’d like featured in a Swag giveaway? Send me an email (see the side bar) and let me know.

Need a unique gift for a special occasion or to comfort a loved one or friend? Visit Cake and a Prayer, an online purveyor of delectable cakes and spiritually uplifting gifts.

{ Comments on this entry are closed }