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Children

Did You Think Kids Need to Go to Pre-school?

April 27, 2010 · 28 comments

David took his kindergarten assessment test today. He did just fine, scoring above average.

I really wasn’t worried, because I know what his abilities are. I’m not saying he’s a genius, but he’s smart enough. He knows his ABCs, 123s, his address. All that basic stuff.

What he learned he learned at home. David didn’t go to pre-school. So that I can stay home with the boys, we live on a pretty tight budget. Pre-school just wasn’t something we could afford.

Since he didn’t need to learn algebra, I was pretty sure I could handle teaching him the basics. I tried for a time to do structured lessons with him every day. It didn’t work for either of  us. There were too many distractions at home.

I’d make a really lousy homeschooling mom.

So his lessons came in the form of discussions when subjects came up. We taught him his address when we taught him what to do if, God forbid, he ever got separated from us out in public. Family time playing Crazy 8′s helped teach him his numbers.

It was fun, and David didn’t know he was learning.

But there were times I wondered if David was at a disadvantage, because he didn’t go to pre-school.  Would he be behind? Was there something he needed to know that I wasn’t teaching him?

Today’s assessment proved that I didn’t need to worry about him learning the necessary “book” skills.

I do still worry a little bit about if he’s been socialized enough. He’s around other kids his age at church. He plays with kids at the park, and he has a new playmate next door now.

I also worry that he hasn’t had enough exposure to structured environments. What  happens when he realizes he’s supposed to sit still, be quiet and follow the teacher’s instructions for four hours a day?

When I ask myself those questions, that’s when I get a small case of Mommy Guilt. Should we have found some way to send him to pre-school after all?

He’ll probably be just fine. But I can’t help it. Mom has to worry a little bit, right?

Did you send your kids to pre-school? Do you think pre-school is necessary?

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I’ll Explain it Tomorrow

March 16, 2010 · 9 comments

Sometimes I like to mess with David’s head, because — well — just because I can. Is it mean? Maybe. Is it fun? Definitely!

“Mommie what day is it?”

“Monday.”

“Is it tomorrow?”

“No. It’s today.”

“But yesterday you said it would be tomorrow. When is tomorrow?”

“Tuesday.”

“So when it’s Tuesday, it will be tomorrow.”

“No, then Tuesday will be today. Tomorrow will be Wednesday.”

“Mommie, you don’t understand what I’m asking. I want to know what day is tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow never comes, because it’s always today.”

“Agh! Mommie! Never mind.”

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Bedtime

March 9, 2010 · 4 comments

After the lazy, relaxing day we had on Sunday celebrating our anniversary, our peaceful little bubble burst as soon as Dave and I walked in the front door with the boys.

Immediately we flew into action getting bedtime under way. We divided up the children, Dave in one room with David while I was in another with Wade.

That’s the good thing about having just two. You still have a 1:1 ratio.

Dave and I passed briefly in the hallway, I in search of a pacifier, he looking for a teddy bear. Items both important to completing the bedtime routine.

“What a difference. Kids — no kids,” Dave said to me as we rushed past each other.

Bedtime, the result of which is silence. However the process of bedtime is anything but.

There are PJs to put on, one last bottle to give, teeth to brush, stories to read, songs to sing. Often it’s all punctuated by whining, and sometimes crying. Or laughter and shrieks from an over-stimulated, over-tired child.

Bedtime is a lot of work for the parents.

We eventually got everyone settled into bed, much later than on a regular night. We went back to the couch, and watched the movie we rented earlier that evening.

The movie ended, and just as we were ready to go to sleep Wade woke up. Something was bothering him, and we didn’t get Wade or ourselves back to bed until 1:30 that morning.

Dave was right. What a contrast our quiet day alone was to our hectic night of parenting. Just hours before we were lounging carefree on the couch lamenting that we didn’t know what to do. There’s no question of what to do when the kids are around. Just a question of what needs to be done first.

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It isn’t Easy, but it’s Worth It

January 7, 2010 · 6 comments

It isn’t easy being a one-income household.

There are a lot things we go with out so that I can stay home, and take care of our boys.

We hardly ever go on vacation. If we do it’s short, and to some place we can drive.

And our cars? They’re older than my five year old.

We don’t have the hottest cell phones. Our clothes are from the sales racks at Old Navy and Target instead of the newest inventory at Macy’s.

The boys aren’t enrolled in Montessori School. I’m the pre-school teacher around here.

When we do purchase something like a new computer or a Wii, we don’t go out and buy it right away. We save until we can afford it.

If the car breaks down or there’s some sort of other unexpected bill, we pay that first. Then we wait even longer for our “wants”.

I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t admit sometimes I’m envious of other moms’ spa days and luxury mini-vans with entertainment systems.

But, you know, all that stuff?

It’s just stuff.

Though our society doesn’t view it that way, things like iPhones and weekly manicures and dinners out four nights a week are really luxuries.

In some homes, and yes even in this country,  just having enough food to eat dinner every night is a luxury.

I am so grateful that our needs are provided for.

I could go back to work.

Then we could go on Disney vacations every year, and I could Tweet from my Blackberry.

But I’d miss out on the one luxury that does really matter to me.

The privilege of being at home with my precious little boys every day.

Oh, sure, there are times I desperately want to talk to someone over 4 feet tall, and want to pull my hair out, and want to lock myself in the bathroom.

But most of the time I’m laughing or giving snuggles or kissing boo-boos. And that’s the stuff I don’t want to live with out.

I wouldn’t give  it up for any of that other stuff.

This is heavy on my heart, because several moms have told me recently they’re going back to work even though they don’t want to.

I know the economy is bad, and it’s scary. I know you wonder some days if you’re going to make it.

If you really want to work, there’s nothing wrong with that. I don’t think everyone should be a stay-at-home-mom.

But if staying home with your children is what you truly desire, then I implore you to weigh all your options. Re-evaluate your financial priorities. Re-work your budget.

You might find a way to make it work.

It could mean giving up small things like gym memberships and designer jeans.

It could mean giving up big things, like downsizing your house or your vehicles.

Is being home with your kids every day worth it?

I think so.

What do you think?

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25 Days of Merry – Day 3 – The Christmas Story

December 3, 2009 · 2 comments

It’s very important to us that our boys understand that the real reason for Christmas is to celebrate the birth of Jesus and the gift of salvation. So for today’s Merry activity we simply read the Christmas story at bedtime from David’s children’s Bible.

Of course it wasn’t the first time David heard the story. But every time we read it he seems to latch on to some new little morsel.

When I read the part where Bethlehem is called The City of David, our David perked up when he heard his name. We stopped and explained to him who King David was, and told him that King David was related to Jesus. Then David said very seriously, “It’s good to be related to Jesus.”

I can only guess at all the benefits David imagines that come along with having Jesus in your family tree. Probably something like all the toys you could ever want.

David was also very concerned by the illustration that shows cows in the stable with the Baby Jesus. In the picture the cows are tied to a post. He wanted to know why the cows were tied up when they were already penned up in a barn. “But they can’t get away. Whey would they tie them up?”

Hopefully somewhere between King David and the cows he also got the rest of the story.

It’s been fun so far trying to think of way to fit some special Christmas activity in every day. Even on busy days like today. Reading that story only took 10 minutes, but it was 10 minutes well spent.

I’ve also been planning some things for next week when we have more time that I’m looking forward to.

This has certainly amped up my Christmas spirit. If you need some holiday cheer I encourage you to try and Make a Little Merry every day too.

The snow that started coming down in big, fluffy flakes tonight also helped add to the Christmas spirit around here. It’s actually sticking, and everything is frosted and sparkling in the moonlight.

David was so happy to see the snow. It didn’t really start coming down good until after dark, but he got to go out in it with Dad for a little while.

There is nothing quite like the the wonder a child finds in the first snow of the season.

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Playing Catch Up

November 12, 2009 · 4 comments

I feel so behind on everything. I’ve felt that way ever since Wade arrived a month early. Despite my best efforts, it seems like I just can’t get ahead of anything. After a month of being sick I feel even farther behind.

There’s the daily stuff like keeping the house clean.

There are always dishes wash. Toys all over the floor. Trash to take out. Floors to be swept. Clutter to be put away. All I usually manage in a day is to get the dishes washed, complete one other small task like cleaning the bathroom, if I’m lucky, and get dinner on table.

But there’s always a hundred other things waiting to be done the next day.

And the laundry. Oh. My. Word. I think it’s just going to swallow me alive. Somehow while I’m washing one load, three more fill up the dirty clothes hampers.

Then there are the all the extra projects that I have no idea when I’ll get to.

I didn’t have a chance to finish decorating Wade’s nursery before he was born, and six months later it’s still not done. The ceilings in the kitchen and living room need painted. I have fabric I bought months ago to make new curtains out of that’s just sitting in my bedroom. I even started a Hall-o-ween craft project I never finished. My refrigerator needs cleaned.

And finally there’s David’s education. He doesn’t go to pre-school so I planned to spend some time every day working with him on letters and numbers starting this fall. I’ve only done it a few times.

I sit and I wonder what’s wrong with me?

Do I manage my time poorly? Am I inefficient? Am I disorganized? Am I lazy?

I don’t know.

It’s not like I’m sitting on the couch eating bon-bons all day. The boy’s daily needs just seem to take up most of my time. And I’m not complaining about that. I am a stay-at-home mom for that very reason. To spend my days taking care of them.

But then I think, “You’re home all day, and you still can’t get the housework done?”

There are some women who just seem to have it all together. Their houses are spotless, they home school, run a business from home and still have time left in the day for leisure.

What is the secret? How do they do it?

I feel frustrated by all the undone things I want to do. I feel guilty about all the things I should do that I don’t. I try to get ahead, but fall farther behind, and just end up feeling over-whelmed.

I know deep down I’m probably being too hard on myself. That I shouldn’t let this stuff bother me. That I should just take it one day at a time.

But it’s all driving me crazy.

Maybe when David and Wade are both in school all day I’ll finally get something done. But that’ s a long time from now.

Do you get over-whelmed like this? How do you manage your time when it comes to caring for your family and running a household?

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There Really is No Headline to Tie Together All this Randomness

October 14, 2009 · 5 comments

Well, it’s been a few days, so I have lots of random, miscellaneous bits and bobs to share.

On the top of the list, Wade turned five months old on Saturday. By my calculations it’s been 143 days, give or take a few, since I last slept through an entire night.

Now, Wade was eating more at one time, going longer in between meals, and sleeping longer at night and nap time as well. But then, all of a sudden, about two weeks ago he started eating smaller amounts every three hours again.

So I decided to whip up some of that fantastically bland rice cereal, and give Wade his first meal on Saturday, hoping it would fill him up and help him sleep.

I know these days doctors recommend holding off on solids until six months, ideally. And they say that cereal won’t help them sleep. I do, however, think it does help them stay full longer, and thus sleep longer. (Hey, doctors say teething doesn’t cause fever and irritability in babies either. What do they know?)  And, frankly, rice cereal hardly qualifies as solid or even as food for that matter. Besides, Wade seemed pretty eager to start eating. He’d watch us eat dinner, drooling and chewing on his little hands like he wanted some too.

You know, when David was a baby I did everything according to what the doctors and the books said. With Wade I’m a bit more relaxed. If we have another one, I just may end up letting he or she run naked and wild in the back yard all day.

All that to lead up to these adorable pictures.

firstbites1

firstbites2

firstbites3

Yes, I know Wade’s eyes are glowing. No, my baby has not been over taken by some evil force. I was just too lazy to edit out the red eye in Photoshop today.

Wade did seem to sleep better after I started the cereal, but he was still just kind of snacking on bottles far too frequently. Suddenly it dawned on me what the problem was. I switched out the stage 2 nipples (how many creepy search engine hits am I going to get from that word?) for stage 3, and he drank down six ounces in no time flat. He was just having to work too hard to eat. See, I’m a little slow, but I get it right eventually.

Speaking of getting things right, you may recall that I had a nasty allergic reaction a few weeks back. I thought it was oven cleaner that did it, but I was wrong. Saturday I discovered that it is the cheap, generic knock off of Pine-sol that I bought at Walmart. I started mopping my kitchen floor that morning, and about five minutes later I started itching.

And now you also know how infrequently my kitchen floor gets mopped these days.

This has nothing to do with anything, but do you know how difficult it is to try and explain Twitter to someone who has no idea what it is? Their eyes kind of glaze over, and I can see the, “Why?” in their expression. Oh, and have you heard about Google Wave? It’s really cool. It will revolutionize the way we use social media to communicate.

There, that’s me trying to sound smart. As if I know anything about social media. But Google Wave is neat. Check it out.

As for being full of crap, our septic tank is apparently also. Too full, so it’s getting pumped tomorrow. Yep. That’s the big excitement around here. I know you are jealous, and wish you had this life.

David, I am sure, will be fascinated by it all. Hopefully the smell will be enough to keep him in the house.

Well, I’m off to bed to get rested up for the big day tomorrow.

And because I’m nearing 800 words. The mark at which they claim readers decide a blog post is too long, and click away.

Honestly, I’m surprised you made it past the first 200.

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