I promised you more about David’s trip to the doctor last week…
After David finished wooing the little girl in the waiting room they called us back.
The nurse did the usual things like weighing David and measuring his height, which only confirmed what I already knew. He’s enormous for his age.
At four years and four months David weighs 50 lbs. and is 44.25 inches tall. He’s above the 97 percentile for both. Because he’s so big, it throws off the calculations on the BMI chart, and he registers as obese.
At one point the doctor gave David a strength test and asked him to pull on her arms. He almost pulled her over. She said he’s also more muscular and stronger than most boys his age which is why he weighs so much, even though he doesn’t look like it.
We’re raising a linebacker.
When the nurse was finished with her part of the exam she gave me a gown to put on David. He never had to wear a gown before. First he didn’t understand why he had to put on a dress, and wanted to just keep his underwear on. Which is what he always did before; diaper, Pull-up, underwear. I guess four is the age when they decide you can handle the humiliation of wearing a hospital gown.
It took a little coaxing, but I did finally get David’s clothes off and the gown on. The only problem, I put it on backwards.
See, at the OBGYN they always gives you those gowns that close in front. So I put the gown on David that way. David looked down at the big gaping opening in the front and said, “That isn’t right.” I figured it probably wasn’t, and switched it around.
The doctor came in and did the exam. Everything went fine, except the part where he almost knocked her on her rear end.
Then as we were finishing up she told me they wanted a urine sample.
They want a four year old boy who can barely hit the mark in a big toilet bowl to give a sample in tiny, tiny cup?
The thing is when a four year old boy hears that he gets to get pee in a cup, to him it sounds like big fun.
David was ready to do it right there in the exam room.
I convinced him that he had to get dressed and go to the bathroom. Getting him out of that gown wasn’t easy. He took a liking to it and told me it was, “comfortable.”
We went in the bathroom, and I explained to him what the goal was. I held the cup. I wasn’t about to leave it all up to him. It was going to be messy as it was.
He did actually get a little in the cup. Most of it was on my hand. The things mothers are called to do for their children.
I took the cup away.
“Wait! I have to go more!”
“Just finish in the toilet.”
“It isn’t full.”
“It’s full enough. You don’t want it to spill.”
“Then dump that out so I can put more in.”
Yep. He was having too much fun peeing in that cup.
I wiped up the mess on the floor and toilet bowl. The we both washed our hands really well.
Checking out at the front desk David announced to everyone in the waiting room his triumph in the bathroom.
The little girl was gone.
It’s a good thing.
I dont’ think she would have been so smitten.
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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Heh! That is way too cute! I feel bad for your hands, though… and I know the woes of having children not on the charts. we go the other way… my son is so tall and slender that he is often below the charts, despite being very well built. He just takes after his dad as a child, is all, lol.
tooooo funny! he is a hoot!
Twitter: acupofjoy
May 4, 2009
I’m still laughing! This is too funny. I cannot wait to share this with his Uncle.
Twitter: NancysBlessings
May 4, 2009
That is so funny!
ha-that is hilarious, but no, seriously—a 4 yr old peeing in a cup??? I hope he doesn’t try practicing this one later!
That is too funny.
I would put a cup in the shower with him & let him practice his aim while he showers
That was so funny. My son is only a year old but this gives me a little insight on what is to come!
Twitter: mommiedaze
May 7, 2009
You have no idea!
Boys are a lot of fun. So different from girls, but a lot of fun.